Grapefruit juice this morning. Then orange juice because I was still hungry. Then mate because why not? Now, a couple hours later, my belly is rumbling, and it's hard not to interpret it as hunger. I still want food, or at least the food that food eats. In a while I'll have my vegetable juice--carrot/apple/beet/ginger yum! But right now, I think it's just stuff going through and having a party with my intestinal fauna. They say human life is all about the bacteria; I hope to feed my bacteria things they want for a while and get them on the same page as the rest of me.

And so it begins again...

I don't have much of an attitude about resetting my caffeine and sugar intake--I have one cup of coffee a day, and I do eat sweets, but not all that terribly much. I don't think I have any trouble with wheat or dairy, but I cut those out as well out of habit and the challenge of it. I've been trying to reduce overeating--I often eat more than I want simply because that's how much is on my plate. I also tend to eat more often than I want simply because that's what's done. "Eat breakfast! It's the most important meal of the day!" Well, not really, and certainly not for me. I have plenty of energy and a good mood with just coffee and something sweet (though I'm switching to homemade bread instead). Most days, I just don't want to eat very much, and I ascribe this to not having a particularly active lifestyle; even on days (or days following) activity, I rarely need much. I suppose there may be something to the theory that eating regularly is good for you--in which case, maybe I should try regular three meals but small. I find if I eat early, I'm hungry all day.

The overeating thing is not just eating what's on my plate; another aspect is feeling hungry. Long past the point of being full enough, I want more. Now, I'm by no means fat, or even overweight, but I have a bit of a beer belly. I can fill that paunch very easily, but sometimes I want more. I think this might be the mechanism gone awry, which I've read happens with people who chronically overeat--the "I'm full" message stops working. On one hand, I can see that historically we'd want to eat as much as possible because we didn't know when we'd eat again. On the other hand, if you've had plenty to eat every day of your life, it seems dysfunctional to keep eating once your full. It feels like an emotional/cognitive issue, like I'm trying to satisfy something besides satiation. Retraining to simply stop when I feel good will probably take some time and effort, but I don't see why it should be too terribly difficult.

Yes, it has happened.  Not a ton to talk about--I fasted for two days, breaking down late on the second and having some food. No alcohol, of course, nor coffee, dairy, gluten, sugar. But pretty darn quickly I started eating my way through the Christmas chocolate, and, it turns out, there's caffeine in yerba mate. About two weeks in I started having some small amount of wheat in my food; probably trace amounts of dairy as well. For the most part, I'm looking for what throws off my digestion. Lots of roughage is good. However, I still am irregular, though I haven't had any real excitement, if you know what I mean. So far, I'd say my digestion is better than usual, though not miraculously better. I added coffee four days ago, I'm adding wheat, in another week I may add dairy, then in February, alcohol. That's back to normal. Maybe I'll delay dairy until mid-February, see how that is

Aside from wanting to get dead drunk in celebration of the Donald's elevation to Corrupter in Chief, the month has been going well. (Actually, I kid. Who knows what's going to happen and how reasonable my fear may be? It seems like the potential end of the American experiment, but perhaps this is just what we need to kick start a surge forward.) I've still had no caffeine aside from that in the 85% chocolate I indulge in frequently. No alcohol. A little sugar, but not much. Avoiding wheat and dairy, but some may sneak into my diet. It's been easy. I could use more exercise, but at least I walked 14 km yesterday in the Womxn's March--the buses were all crammed, so I had to walk to the start point, then the 5.5 km march, then walking home. It took an hour and a half for the crowd around me to actually start moving. About an hour in, someone next to me says, "Is this the line for the bathroom?" Eating well has been easy enough, though I wouldn't have minded a slice of pizza last night. In all, it's been a good month; exercise and resume--those are my next steps.

Not such a bad year for austerity. I only fasted one full day, instead of my more usual two. Much, much easier. And I haven't restricted myself to all raw, fresh foods--I have to cook for Nicholas anyway, so I figure I may as well make something I can eat. I'm off wheat and dairy as well as the usual sugar, caffeine, and alcohol. Mostly eating raw, fresh foods, but I made a soup, and cooked some chicken, I'm going to make some very weird refried beans tonight. If you can eat a corn chip, you're not suffering.

Sugar, as always, is hard--I so want to have some of the Christmas chocolate. And I will soon enough; I don't feel the need to go a whole month without sugar. I just need to make sure that I'm not eating too much.

I don't notice the lack of coffee. My relationship with coffee is funny--some researchers say it's one of the best things we Americans consume, but we still have a Puritanical belief that there's something wrong with it. I drink so little that I doubt it's an issue, much less a problem, but I still like the self-control of refusing my habits and going without. There's always herbal tea! And I have a killer detox tea of my own devising with dandelion, turmeric, burdock, milk thistle, and cinnamon. No senna anymore--I overdosed on that. It tastes pretty awful, though if you drink it alone, with nothing better tasting around it, it's bearable.

Fresh juice is always amazing. Grapefruit and/or orange, apple/carrot/beat/ginger. I should start growing wheat grass again, if for no other reason then because the gittens would probably like to chew on it. Now if I can just get my exercise level to where it should be, maybe a twenty-mile bike ride a day, all would be good. But it's cold outside, and I mean really cold, so, I'm off the hook.

Here it is, 2017, and I've started my fast. Liver flense tea and water. I didn't go to breakfast, I'll only stay briefly at the traditional New Year's Day party. I will watch most of the Seahawks with friends, but there won't be wings, so who cares?

Normally by now I'd have had a cup of black coffee and a cookie or piece of coffee cake or something unfitting to a life lived responsibly. Not a lot of food, but enough to last until late lunch, which is when I prefer to eat my big meal of the day. Today, without those, I started out with the idea of hunger which to many amounts to the same thing as hunger. 

Less than a month to go. Then: no booze, nor sugar, nor caffeine. Healthy food. Fresh juice and lots of cooking. (It's not all bad.)

Homemade scones with strawberry jam is a better breakfast than nothing.

I read recently (again) about how important breakfast is--it stabilizes your blood sugar, it gives you energy for the day, it regulates your metabolism. So I started eating breakfast again, and after a week, I was a) hungry all the time, b) a few pounds heavier, and c) no happier or more energetic. Then I read (again) about how great intermittent fasting is for you--refraining from food for hours a day or a day a week. I find it amusing how facts are often fads and how little the fact-fads actually do aside from giving us the impression that we're in control. A year from now, I may look back at today and laugh at my naievity, but probably I'll be torn (again) between conflicting information about what is necessary and what causes instant death.  

Now I get to prepare for the complete emptying of my system from the dread colonoscopy. Days of no fiber is like days of no food. All I eat any more is fiber. They say everyone's poop on the inside, but that won't be true of me come Monday.

I've been having fun growing wheat berries into wheat grass, and buying whole grains and herbs to grind into flour and tea. I do want a gin & tonic, tho.

I remember hearing years and years ago that black pepper was harmful. I recently came across this recipe for homemade ramen, which I'm dying to try. At one point, the writer mentions white pepper, so, of course, I have to find out how white pepper differs from black pepper (white pepper is ripened longer and has the skin removed), which made me wonder if I should continue or abandon a mild lifelong fear of pepper because it causes cancer. I found this. In a peppercorn, it says, "all condiments are harmful." (I will not try to fathom why foods that are "food" are good, but foods that are "condiments" are harmful; it's just too funny, and I might hurt myself.) One can find on the Internet support for pretty much any thought, but between "all condiments are harmful," on one hand and Livestrong's, "this contention [that black pepper is linked to stomach cancer] is not supported by any scientific evidence (see here)," I think I'll stop worrying about pepper. Thanks Internet, you are so hype.